So little sister got herself a cute little dolly that she likes an awful lot. Really.
And it is cute…. until you push it’s little button… then it sings…. cute, right? Yeah… about that… I imagine some of you know where I am going here
Yeah, it sings “Jesus Loves Me”
Sure, it is a cute voice, and a beautiful sentiment and all…. but oh my, is it hard on the ears when it is incessant.
And given my general animosity towards organized religion, I am convinced this doll can lead to nothing good, at least as it is. I mean, not real fond of bursting into flames myself, don’t know about you.
So the first time little sister wanted to take dolly in the bath with her, I was ready to say OK…. but she balked at the last moment, not wanting to get dolly’s clothes wet. She just looked at me crazy when I suggested taking dolly’s clothes off. She moved on to another toy. My opportunity had passed me by
But tonight, I got another chance. She came to mommy in the kitchen, asking for help undressing said dolly for bath time.
Now my wife initially started to balk, worried that the doll might electrocute little sister, going into the tub.
I assured her that it would be fine. And she hit me with the “Are you 100% sure this isn’t going to electrocute my baby girl?
Being Pisces, and pragmatic, having learned the hard way about Murphy’s Law, I couldn’t say 100%…. So I did the next best thing. I grabbed the doll, and gave it a little baptism in the sink.
Gonna exorcise that song right out of this little doll. Baptism by Immersion, will knock that propaganda right out yer little soul…. you are saved little doll!! Saved!
Hell-a-loo-yah! (sorry, couldn’t help myself)
Doll came out fine, and, after messing with my wife by pretending it was electrocuting me while I was holding it there, I brought dolly out, voiceless and sublime.
She now is playing surfs up in the tub, frolicking and having a grand old time…. saved that doll from the Nunnery, I did, yessir, saved that doll…