Smurfs Never Had A Chance #smurfmassacre #dadlife

It was awful. Rendered Smurf was everywhere. The walls, the floor, were awash in iridescent blue goo. Sticky, sweet and seemingly on every surface.

And the children? Wheeling about like drunken lunatics., flailing, and flinging bits of blue off themselves like sparks, or the detritus of a shaking, wet dog.

Sucking Smurf gobs off their little fingers, and stuffing wads of spongy innards in their mouths. With squeals, and grunts alternately rising from the crowd. It was truly appalling.

And they justify this barbarity by calling them cupcakes!

The horror!

#dadlife

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