Setting: Dude and Bro, watching tv. Dude is Channel surfing, Stopping on an informercial.
bro: “dude, turn it”
dude: “hold on bro”
Infomercial Voice:
“Do you find yourself kicking yourself for giving obvious douchebags a second chance in the fb era?”
“Just cuz ya wanted to see what was up with them?”
“Did you friend people, that in retrospect, were people you would have tried to avoid at the county fair?
I did
Wish you could undo that mistake, without actually having to unfriend them?
What about in laws, relatives, friends of the spouse, or the ex?
Tired of dealing with their shit, But dont have the time or energy to go thru and block or unfollow all the knuckleheads on yer feed?
Well, let me introduce to you….
The latest in face products,
Some Digital dermatology,
if you will,
the facebook scrub!
Inlaws? Pastors? Ex girlfriends? Collection agencies? Tired of them showing up in your feed?
Scrubbed.
How do we do it you ask?
Well, the details are proprietary, but I can tell you, quite frankly,
Our bots spit out targeted, client specific vile and disgusting shit to your targets pages until they, yes they, block you!
Pastor bugging you?
Oh, jesus will be doing vile shit in your next, bot produced msg to them. Hell, the next 100, that is our guarantee!
Yes sir, targeted, bot driven 24/7 bombardment until they block you…
Priceless, right?
Not today,
today, for a one time fee, you can have this protection for the rest of your life
How much would..…….. (
(static as Dude changes the channel)
dude: “Thats stupid man”
bro: “stupid”
dude: “I mean, how hard is it to block someone? How lazy you gotta be?”
(Pause)
bro: “Dude”
dude: “Yeah?”
bro: “Hes gonna make a mint!”
dude: “right?”
……… and, scene.
Link to the audio on my podcast, below:
https://anchor.fm/alan-madden-rose/episodes/fbscrub–digital-dermatology-skit–my-reading-of-it-e516fd
………
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